Words of Comfort When Your Heart is Broken

This collection of words of comfort will lift your spirits and heal your soul. When your heart is broken, you need warmth and companionship – and the feeling that you’re not alone.

“When I lost my husband, I felt as if I did not want to go on,” said Kerry on Starting Over in Your 60s – After Your Husband Dies. “Absolutely nothing seemed to matter, and a year down the line my life still seems a pointless exercise. BUT….there are days when I smile at the memories rather than burst into tears. Although it never gets better, the grief does get more manageable. Finding the right words of comfort helped helped me enormously. I’m also working with another widow whose husband died five years ago, and when we are both overwhelmed by a sudden memory (and one never knows what will trigger them) we know it’s okay to cry when your heart is broken. I learnt so much about people as well – some were devils that I thought angels, and others vice versa. I was preyed upon by some and prayed for by others. It is hard, but coping comes with time, and the only consolation I can offer is that you are not alone.”





What really stood out to me in Kerry’s comment was her words, “finding the right words of comfort.” The thoughts and images that help me heal – that give me hope and healing – may not be words of comfort to you.

So, I encourage you to read through this collection slowly. When you find a quotation or thought that stands out to you, write it down. Keep it close by, and read it out loud when you find yourself overwhelmed by pain or grief.

Words of Comfort When Your Heart is Broken

I gathered these tips and comforting words at the request of a reader…

“We were together for over 15 years,” wrote Michelle on Surviving a Breakup – 10 Tips for When Your Relationship Ends. “I really thought we’d stay married forever. Instead, he told me that he doesn’t feel love for me anymore, and that he wants to be free to explore possibilities with other people. How can I get past this? I can’t stand the idea of rebuilding my life and I wish things were the way they’ve always been. I’d appreciate any words of encouragement or comfort that anyone could offer.”

You are not alone

A reader responded to Michelle by saying she comforts herself when she’s sad, heartbroken, or depressed by watching movies that she loves. She finds healing and warmth in watching her favorite actors and actresses, and rewatching movies that make her cry. It helps her see she’s not alone. That’s not my way – though I do love the movie “About a Boy” with Hugh Grant! There’s a lot of pain in that movie, as well as love, connection, and hope. Just like real life.

Different types of comfort are helpful for different types of people, but we all need to know we’re not alone. For this article, I focused on spiritual and emotion words of comfort and healing. I feel secure when I connect with God, because I believe He looks out for me, loves me, and wants the best for me. Other people might find music more comforting (such as the best songs for broken hearts), or their pets, or painting a picture, or even food.

The pain you feel will fade

You hurt. You’re wounded, and you may feel like you’ll never recover. I don’t know how you feel, but I can imagine the depth of your pain. Sometimes there are no words of comfort that heal a broken heart…there’s just the knowledge that someone out there is praying for you. Believe me when I tell you that your pain will ease and your wounds will heal. It’ll take time and you may walk in the shadows longer than you’d like…but your pain will eventually fade. The shadows will lighten and sunshine will once again fill your spirit and soul.

God never promised that life would be easy, or that life would be free from pain, but He has promised that He will always be there when you need Him. He may not give you the answers you seek, and He may not erase the pain you feel…but He is always there, waiting for you. You’re free to tell Him how much it hurts, unburden your sad heart to Him, and you will surely feel His love filling the aching void that has been left in your life.

You will heal if you go into the pain

I remember the exact moment that I lost my sister. She didn’t die; she told me she never wanted to speak to me again. She didn’t give me a reason why, and she refused to talk to me for more than 10 years. I wrote about it in How to Let Go of Someone You Love – it was the most terrible experience of my whole life. Worse than when my grandma died, because my sister chose to cut me out of her life. Worse than when I found out my husband and I can’t have children, and worse than hearing my dog cry out in pain after being attacked by another dog.

But I healed. I never thought I’d overcome my feelings of regret, failure, and confusion…but somehow I found healing and peace. I have to admit that it wasn’t words of comfort that healed me, though. It was opening my heart and soul to the healing flow of God’s divine love.

  • “Let your tears come.  Let them water your soul.”  – Eileen Mayhew.
  • “God can heal a broken heart, but He has to have all the pieces.”  – Unknown.
  • “God brings men into deep waters, not to drown them, but to cleanse them.”  – John Aughey.

My prayer is that you open your heart to God, and let His love and peace fill your soul. May you find comfort in His word, whether He speaks through Scripture, other people, words of comfort on the internet, or the still, small voice you’ve heard in your head in the past.

You really do have something to look forward to

One of the most difficult parts of losing someone you love is feeling like there’s nothing left for you. No joy, no love, no future. Here are several quotations about healing – and about looking forward, to the future.

“When love is lost, do not bow your head in sadness; instead keep your head up high and gaze into heaven for that is where your broken heart has been sent to heal.” ~ Unknown.

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” ~ Alexander Graham Bell.





“It has been said that time heals all wounds. The truth is that time does not heal anything. It merely passes. it is what we do during the passing of time that helps or hinders the healing process.” ~ Jay Marshall.

“One tear met another tear floating down the river. Said the first tear, ‘I’m the tear of the woman who lost her lover.’ The second tear said, ‘I’m the tear of the woman who found him.’” ~ Anonymous.

And this one is my favorite:

“You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.” ~ Jan Glidewell.

A new season is beginning in your life

In How to Stop Crying When It’s Over, I describe how peaceful it is to think of your life as “seasonal.”

That is, there are seasons that include certain people and specific types of love, and there are seasons that don’t involve those people. When it’s over – when a season ends – we have no choice but to accept it.

A Time for Everything

– Ecclesiastes 3:2-8

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

A time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,

A time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,

A time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,

A time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,

A time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,

A time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

Right now, you’re searching for words of comfort because your heart is broken. But soon, this season of your life will end. You will be in a new season. You’ll remember the past with love and a twinge of sadness…but if you allow yourself to heal, you will enjoy a new season in your life.

Your aching heart will find the right comfort food

Here’s a little story about a woman who lost her dog – and how her “words of comfort” were found in a picnic with a friend…

Words of Comfort When Your Heart is Broken

Words of Comfort When Your Heart is Broken

“[When my dog died], a good friend came over with some cheap but delicious Mexican food from La Fresita. She brought a Cuban sandwich and a green chili burrito….the Cuban sandwich was stuffed with thinly sliced pork, onions, tomatoes, grated lettuce, and some secret sauce. And the green chili burrito was also stuffed with a more meatier pork and spicy chili verde. I ate ravenously.

We washed it all down with about two-thirds of a bottle of Charles Shaw (or three-buck Chuck) zinfandel. With a full stomach and slight buzz, I felt whole again. My dear sweet Painter boy who always savored every bite would have totally approved of my comfort food fest. Feeding the hungry heart was just what I needed.” ~ Comfort Food for a Broken Heart by Karyn Zoldan.

What or who has comforted you in the past? You may not be able to recreate that exact environment or person, but hold on to the feeling of healing and being comforted. Allow that old type of healing to refresh your soul and revive your spirit.

“There are things that we don’t want to happen but have to accept, things we don’t want to know but have to learn, and people we can’t live without but have to let go.” – unknown.

One last word of comfort when your heart is broken…

Sometimes what seems like the worst thing ever – the most heartbreaking loss you’ve experienced – might actually be the best thing for you, even if you can’t see it. For example, my husband and I can’t have kids. We’re coped with the pain and broken dreams that infertility brings.

I still feel sad and lonely when I see a pregnant woman or when I hold a baby. That pain will never completely go away – though it has faded. There are no words of comfort to heal that broken part of my heart. But, what has always helped me feel better is my belief that I’m not meant to have children. My purpose is to create and write for Blossom, to walk alongside people in pain. My purpose is to write articles to encourage you to look upwards and inwards, and to hold on to what is good, pure, right, and true in your life.

Healing After a Loss

comforting words of comfortIn A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows Through Loss, Jerry L. Sittser shares how a tragic car accident claimed three generations of his family: his mother, his wife, and his young daughter.

While most of us will not experience such a catastrophic loss in our lifetime, all of us will be faced with tragedy that makes us search for words of comfort in times of loss and grief. A Grace Disguised plumbs the depths of sorrow, whether due to illness, divorce, or the loss of someone we love. The circumstances are not important; what we do with those circumstances is. In experiencing what feels like the end of our lives and our selves, we can come to the beginning of a new life―one marked by spiritual depth, joy, compassion, and a deeper appreciation of simple blessings.

“The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning.” – Ivy Baker Priest.

May you find the right words of comfort, and may you accept and surrender to whatever is happening in your life. May your soul heal, your spirit flourish, and your heart be one less shade of broken.

Turn your face upwards and allow the healing rain to help you Blossom.





xo





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22 Responses

  1. Laurie says:

    Dear Ann,

    Thank you for your beautiful, honest thoughts! It is painful to accept the possibility that you may never have children. I’ve accepted it, and it is not easy. But….like you said, nothing is permanent here on earth. Every blessing is temporary: children, a spouse, a home, parents, pets….we must learn how to be humbly grateful for every joy we receive, for it is all passing.

    That’s why Ecclesiastes is my favorite book of the Bible, especially when I’m looking for words of comfort. “Everything is meaningless,” says the Teacher. There seems to be no rhyme or reason; all we can do is eat, drink, enjoy our relationships, and love God. I don’t know why this comforts me, but it always does. Maybe because it’s like you said: we’re all in the same boat.

    It’s so funny you should mention that you get confused between the “never get over” and “will always feel loss” — because just today I was listening to a Rob Bell podcast on Wisdom. He’s a pastor and author; this podcast was about how we tend to want duality in our lives.

    That is, we want peace. Or joy. Or healing. Or grief. But, we have a hard time accepting peace AND grief, joy AND loss, bitter AND sweet.

    Life is both bitter and sweet – bittersweet. We might find laughter and healing at a funeral, or grief and sadness at a wedding. We might feel fear and heartache when we hold a baby for the first time; we might feel relief when an ill loved one finally passes on.

    Learn about duality. http://robbell.podbean.com/e/episode-117-wisdom-part-2-welcome-to-your-heart/ is the link to Rob’s Wisdom podcast – he often talks about duality.

    Take care of yourself. Know that life is full of contradictions that can and do go together! Sometimes taking care of yourself is denying yourself that extra piece of chocolate cake, or it’s making yourself run that extra mile. Pampering yourself might be a bubble bath, or forcing yourself to pick up your flute or paintbrush today because you know you’ll feel a million times better after you play.

    Take care of yourself, Ann. I hope to hear from you again!

    In peace and passion,
    Laurie

  2. Ann says:

    May…your heart be one less shade of broken. Thank you for this. It gives me hope that there will be meaning ahead without pain and loss being part of it.
    And this: “The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning.” – Ivy Baker Priest. Also this, gives me hope, in the middle of hopelessness.

    I do get confused between the “never get over” and “will always feel loss” , and the healing to live joyfully again. Those are contradictions and they can’t go together. I don’t see a future. In fact, my fears that I have to support myself the rest of my life and do not have the drive or desire (or mind’s ability) to dig into work that will provide enough. I left a stressful line of work to focus on what I am now realizing is highly unlikely to happen. I can’t accept it. I was slapped with the realization (that is too soon to accept) that it is highly possible I may never bare children. It is due to events that I had no control over and could not accept. I thought God would take care of those things…send healing and give me a family of my own. I had not one thought that He wouldn’t. Now it seems I must accept that it is not likely. I lived all those years with the wrong impression of God?

    How can you move on when you can’t let go of the dream that defines who you are, who you were made to be? How do you fit in, when everyone in your universe is on a different lifeline? Where do you go to keep on going, just to get through the rest of time? Life is so long when it’s not working. The only other thing that gives me comfort is this: no one gets to keep anything here. No one gets to keep their families, spouses, children, sense of belonging, ANYTHING in this life, we do not keep. It’s short, passing, and we all leave it at some point. That is my only comfort. That I am not so different (less favored) than others. It’s all temporary here. That is one comfort.

  3. Laurie says:

    So much can happen in 7 years! You’ve changed, she’s changed…and it’s not easy to say if it’s a good idea to get back together.

    I have written several articles about making this big decision about your relationship – and here’s one of my favorites:

    5 Things to Think About Before You Reconcile With Your Ex
    http://www.theadventurouswriter.com/quipstipsrelationships/when-your-ex-wants-you-back-should-you-give-him-a-second-chance/

    I know these aren’t the “words of comfort” you were looking for, but I hope the article helps you decide what to do. Love is risky because it makes us vulnerable…but love is worth it!

  4. jj says:

    i feel in love with a girl 7 years ago after 3 years of dating she travelled pregnant for me, getting there she aborted the baby and stopped calling for the past 4 years, Now shes back with another man’s baby begging me for forgiveness. What should I do?

  5. Laurie says:

    If you’re searching for words of comfort because your heart is broken after a relationship breakup, read:

    Help Getting Over a Breakup
    http://theadventurouswriter.com/quipstipsrelationships/help-getting-over-a-breakup-how-to-change-your-story/

    I wrote it to help you change how your think about the breakup, which can empower and strengthen you.

  6. Alisha says:

    I’m so broken tonight, I need these words of comfort. My boyfriend is a liar, and I can’t trust him.

  7. Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen says:

    Accepting what life brings us seems so simple, but it’s really difficult. I’m glad these words of comfort were helpful, and hope you find peace, healing, and joy in your life.

  8. melvin says:

    thanks for the words,they are truly comforting, and I have learned that you have to accept in life

  9. Laurie Pawlik-Kienlen says:

    My “words of comfort when your heart is broken” do not seem adequate for what you’re experiencing.

    I am sorry for your loss, and for the pain you’re experiencing. May you find hope and encouragement in surprising places, and may you see you’re not alone. I pray you feel the warmth of God’s love, and allow His peace to fill you. May you move forward in joy and surrender.

    Blessings,
    Laurie

  10. Lerato Clodia says:

    Thank you for these words of comfort, my heart is broken. I was in love with someone and I was truly loving him but he didn’t tell me that he have a wife. we did lot of things but he now telling me that he is married. I’m heart broken because I didn’t know from the beginning.

  11. Veronica says:

    I was onced hurt by my husband he cheated me.. He broke my heart and left me and he chose the girl but now I moved on. I am very happy being with my children I believed that god is the key to make your life more colorful.. Pray and let god do the rest for you

  12. Jenny Baddeley says:

    Please don’t think I’m strange but my beautiful cat Bob was ran over x killed in the early hours of Tuesday I miss him so much I know it’s only been two days but my heart is broken

  13. Laurie says:

    I’m sorry for what you’re going through. I know these words of comfort won’t heal your broken heart, but I hope they help you see that you WILL survive this! You can move on and be happy again…you just need to give yourself time to grieve. Find ways to heal and comfort yourself.

  14. abimbila says:

    I dated a guy for 6 months. Everything was perfect until he was away for a month and then he started acting up. Only to tell me he was confused about the relationship and didn’t have feelings for me. This is someone that professed his undying love for me. It felt so real as we had started planning our future today. He says he has to see me first to get his head straight but I don’t think that is how love works….I have been living in tears for the past 3 days now and I regret loving him

  15. maria says:

    I am married but caught my husband cheating he broke my heart so I break it off.

  16. Kelly W says:

    I’m so very heart broken…I let my emotions get the best of me & made an irrational decision…I asked the love of my life to leave our home…we had been having issues in our relationship, I regret that we couldn’t work things out before separating…I love him so, he is my one & only true love…I hope & pray that we can get past these hurdles & restore our love & relationship…I miss & love him so, I can’t get his voice out of my head, his face, his touch…I love him so, I need him to come back to me & mend my broken heart

  17. Laurie says:

    You’re more than your past failures and mistakes. You’re more than what you’ve been demonstrating up to this point in your life. Don’t let your screw ups define you. Instead, let your potential guide you toward becoming the person you want to be. – unknown, emailed to me by a friend.

  18. Laurie says:

    I’m sorry that your hearts are broken, and hope you found comfort here! Sometimes the best thing to do is write down how you feel. Expressing yourself can bring comfort – and so can knowing you’re not alone.

  19. Ann says:

    I met dis guy at a weddin reception,we started datin nd d first month of our relationship was so wonderful,i loved him so much nd he loved me too or i tot he did,until his girlfriend from God knows where showed up on his birthday nd treatened my lyf,after sum tym he asked for my forgiveness nd promised to send d girl away,i’m confused,i don’t know wat to believe,i’m torn into two.

  20. Sally says:

    I ruined the best thing that ever happened to me. I hurt the one who I love the most in my life by cheating. And he’s left me now and I regret cheating on him so much. It was only once, but that was enough to ruin everything between us. And now I’m left heatbroken with also the burden that it was all my fault that I feel this way. I shouldn’t be allowed to complain about how hurt I am because truthfully I broke my own heart by cheating. I love him dearly and can only hope that one day we may meet again and it will all be forgotten. I have truly learnt my lesson, and hate myself so much for ever betraying the one person in my life who meant the most to me.

  21. Ndi says:

    I’m fully heartbroken as the best of my relationship is over, the man i loved dearly and adored just came to me two days ago and told me that he has made his decision and he chose to be with the other woman and not me as he feels its best for me and he had made a promise to his late father that he will marry the woman so he needs to keep that promise.I feel empty, betrayed and unsure if iI’ll ever conquer the pain.

  22. john petersen says:

    i am married and fell in love with another woman. Me and the woman broke it off and i won’t go back but right now my heart is broken.

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