The hardest thing about starting a new relationship – or rebuilding trust in a damaged relationship – is the risk of heartbreak. How do you know if you can trust a man with your heart? What if he leaves or betrays you, stops loving you, or destroys your trust in him?
It all comes down to trust. You have to trust your inner voice, rely on your friends and family to help you see him clearly, and allow your relationship to unfold one step at a time. You have to trust that even this man breaks your heart, you will survive. You will cry and grieve the loss of love, but you have to trust that your broken heart will heal.
Good news! You can trust a man with your heart and not fear the future. If you trust in something bigger than a man, more powerful than you and more awesome than the most breathtaking mountaintop, you’ll be free to give your whole heart to a man without worrying about the outcome. You’ll know that even if he does break your heart and destroy your trust in that relationship, you will rise and love again.
Will he break your heart? Yes. In a thousand little ways — even if you’ve been happily married for 40 years! No man is perfect, and no man can completely fulfill and love us the way we want and need to be loved. No relationship is perfect, even if both partners are trustworthy, loving, committed and loyal.
You will break his heart in a thousand little ways, too. You can’t love any man perfectly, because you are not perfect. Your relationship will be filled with little bits of broken trust. This is part of being human and in love. Don’t let fear stop you from loving with your whole heart.
3 Signs You Can Trust a Man With Your Heart
“How do I know if I can trust him?” is a question many She Blossoms readers ask. There are no simple answers. Knowing if you can trust someone with your heart – especially if you were hurt in a past relationship – isn’t easy. But it is possible.
These signs you can trust a new boyfriend or rebuild trust in a rocky relationship are inspired by Genesis 24. It’s the story of how Abraham trusted Eliezer, his old faithful servant, to find a wife for Isaac. This chapter is part of my She Blossoms Through the Bible project and contains one of the strongest examples of relationship trust I’ve ever seen.
1. He has been trustworthy in the past
The reason Abraham chose Eliezer to find a wife for Isaac is simple: they had a long, close history of trust. Eliezer proved himself trustworthy in a thousand different ways, and Abraham knew his faithful old servant and friend would find the right woman. Abraham trusted Eliezer with his camels, rings, bracelets, shekels, servants and belongings. Most importantly, Abraham trusted this man with his heart and his son’s future.
In your relationship, what are the signs you can trust this man with your heart? One of the most important signs is the length of a relationship. Any man can appear trustworthy for a week, month, or even a year. But the longer you know someone, the more you learn about them. Most relationship experts advise new couples to date for at least a year before getting married because time reveals strengths, weaknesses, quirks, lifestyles, habits, goals, history. If you’re searching for “signs you can trust a man with your heart”, you may be picking up on untrustworthy hints and clues. What don’t you trust about him?
2. You see how he treats other people
Genesis 24 shows us how trustworthy Eliezer was. He was a man of his word; he did exactly what he said he would do. He was the first person in the Bible to specifically ask God for clear guidance and direction. Eliezer spoke kindly, communicated clearly, and shared his thoughts openly. He asked questions, listened to the answers, and observed other people carefully. Eliezer put his responsibilities above his own needs (Genesis 24:33), and was clear and descriptive about his plans (verses 34-49). Abraham trusted this man with his heart because he was loyal, eager, open-minded, and willing.
How does your man treat other people? Is he consistent and reliable in what he says and does? Do other people trust him, does he have close relationships with friends and family? Watch what he says and does. If he acts one way with you and another way with others, then he may not be the most trustworthy man. If he lies, cheats or steals then you know you can’t trust him with your heart! Listen to your inner voice. Even better — a million times better — ask God for wisdom, clarity, and insight. And listen for His response; God will speak to you through Scripture, other people, books, your own intuition, and even articles like this.
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If you recently met a man and don’t know if you can trust him with your heart, read How to Know if You Can Trust Someone in a New Relationship.
3. You trust and love God with your whole heart
Abraham knew he could trust Eliezer not because Eliezer was paid to do a job, but because Abraham trusted God with his heart. Abraham trusted that God would guide Eliezer to the right wife for Isaac, that God had already prepared Rebekah to be Isaac’s wife, and that Rebekah and Isaac would continue the family line. Abraham didn’t know what the outcome of Eliezer’s mission would be, but he knew he could trust God with his heart. And that was all that mattered.
What is your heart set on? If your heart is set on a man to bring you love, joy, peace and security, then you’ll be disappointed. If you think a healthy relationship, marriage and family is all you need to be happy, then you’ll be forever chasing a dream. A strong relationship is a wonderful part of life — a gift from God, a blessing — but it isn’t a guarantee of joy, peace, or love. You can never fully trust a man with your heart because he is just a man. And you are just a woman. Together, you can build a healthy and happy relationship…but if your hearts are set one each other, then they will be broken.
Set your heart on God. Build your relationship with the Holy Spirit. Learn how to trust Jesus — the perfect Son of Man — with all of your heart and mind and soul, and your other relationships will fall into place.
May you find wisdom and guidance as your earthly and Heavenly relationships unfold. May you see the signs clearly and know without a doubt whether you can trust the man you want to love with your heart. May you move forward boldly, with love and confidence that no matter what happens in this relationship — even if your heart gets broken — you are safe and secure in the loving embrace of Jesus. Amen.
Your thoughts — big and little — are welcome below! What signs are telling you that you can or can’t trust this man with your heart? How do you feel about trusting him, trusting God, and moving forward wholeheartedly?
With His love,
She Blossoms Through the Bible – Previous Articles
- Coping With Loneliness After You Lose Your Husband – Genesis 23
- How to Trust God When You’re Scared – Genesis 22
- Finding the Strength You Need to Continue – Genesis 21
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” ~ Philippians 4:6-7.