Are you dwelling in the past or worrying about the future? Whether you’re struggling with negativity because of things that happened in the past, or worries about what life will bring later today, tomorrow, or next year – you can learn how to stop negative thoughts that seem to take control of your life. And, you WILL Blossom into the woman you were created to be! Trust me. Come fly with me.
“We all have set patterns in life,” writes Richard Templar in The Rules of Life:A personal code for living a better, happier, more successful kind of life. “We like to label ourselves as this or that and are quite proud of our opinions and beliefs. We all like to read a set paper, watch the same sorts of TV programs or movies, go to the same sort of shops every time, eat the food that suits us, wear the same type of clothes. And all this is fine. But if we cut ourselves off from all other possibilities, we become bored, rigid, hardened — and thus likely to get knocked about a bit.”
One of the most common ways to get trapped in inflexible, rigid thinking is to allow negative thoughts to control our lives. Instead of living joyfully in the present, we find ourselves stuck living in the past. Instead of renewing our minds and training ourselves to change how we think, we let negativity, gloom and doom to overtake our lives.
No more. You, my friend, are clearly ready to make a change in your life! And so am I.
How to Stop Negative Thoughts From Controlling Your Life
Here’s what I want to stop: every morning while making coffee, I keep thinking about a negative experience I had in California. It was at a hotel; the manager was so rude, inflexible, and offensive that I just can’t seem to stop marveling at how poorly he handled the situation.
I’m sick of that guy, so I decided to research thought stopping and negativity. And what I learned will help you learn how to stop negative thoughts from controlling your life…
1. Identify your negative thought patterns and places
For some reason, I’ve developed a habit of allowing negative thoughts to control my mind when I’m making coffee first thing in the morning. Granted, it’s 4:30 am and I’m pretty groggy, so I’m not focused on what I should be thinking about! I don’t have a lot of thought control that early. But why has my brain grooved on this line of negative thinking? I don’t know, and the truth is it doesn’t really matter how or why I’m stuck in this track. More important is how I will stop those negative thoughts from controlling the morning coffee-making time of my life.
What about you — when are negative thoughts most likely to control your life? Does negativity creep in all day, or just at certain times? Are you plagued by the same negative thoughts, or do different ones announce themselves at different times of the day or night? The more you learn about the negative thoughts that control your life, the closer you are to stopping them.
2. Create a home base
Blech! I hate that the mean manager’s ugly mug is one of the first thoughts I have in the morning. Talk about negative and un-Blossomy. Actually, let’s NOT talk about negative and un-Blossomy. Let’s talk about positive thoughts and Blossoming.
A practical tip for stopping negative thoughts from controlling your life: create a home base and run to it every time the negativity surfaces.
“Before you can touch base you have to know where base is,” writes Templar in The Rules of Life. “Base is home. Base is where you belong. Base is where you feel comfortable, secure, loved, restored and trusted. Base is where you feel strong and in control. Base is anywhere you can kick your shoes off, metaphorically and physically, and reset your head safe in the knowledge you’ll be looked after.”
Where is home base for you? If you feel alone in life, read 7 Things to Remember When You Feel Like No One Cares.
3. Run from negative thoughts to home base
I found home base for me, and it works every time. As soon as those those negative thoughts and images rise up, I simply shift over to Jesus. It actually works quickly and easily! You don’t have to be a believer to find your “home base”, though. As long as you’re dwelling in a positive happy space, running from negativity to home base will work for you, too.
When I start thinking about mean manager, I shift my thoughts over to the time Jesus turned water into wine. His mom went to him at this wedding party, saying they were running out of drinks for the guests. Jesus told her that His time hadn’t yet come, and she just turned to the servants and instructed them to do whatever He said. So, Jesus listened to His mother and turned water into wine. Good wine, too — not the cheap swill I drink.
That’s my home base. As soon as I think of Jesus’ first miracle, I immediately stop negative thoughts from controlling my life! Quite amazing, actually.
What about you — what is your home base? Maybe it’s a happy memory, a peaceful experience on a mountaintop, a relaxing day at the beach, a fantastic anniversary or birthday party. Maybe it’s God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit.
Pick your home base. Then go there. That’s a simple and effective tip on how to stop negative thoughts from controlling your life: replace them with positive, uplifting thoughts.
4. Keep running home
Home is where you’re loved, accepted, and wanted. It’s positive and light, life and peace. Home gives you motivation and power — and it gives you the strength you need to learn how to stop negative thoughts from controlling your life. At home, you are accepted without question. Unconditionally. Fully.
The trick is to KEEP RUNNING HOME when those negative thoughts creep in. For they will creep in and try to control your life. Every morning, I fight the image of the mean manager’s ugly mug. I don’t know why he is haunting me, but I know how to make him disappear. Maybe God is letting me wrestle with the manager because it drives me back to my home base of Jesus.
So maybe those negative thoughts are actually a blessing in disguise. Sure, they’re trying to control my life with negativity…but what’s really happening is more peace, joy, freedom, and love in my life.
Blossoming With the Rules of Life
“Whatever the past was, it’s gone,” writes Richard Templar in The Rules of Life: A personal code for living a better, happier, more successful kind of life. “There is nothing you can do to change anything that has gone before and so you must turn your attention to the here and now. It is hard to resist the allure of dwelling what has gone before. But if you want to be successful in your life, you have to turn your attention to what is happening for you right now.”
I love this book! In it, Templar shares 100 insights into living a happier, healthier, more positive life. He doesn’t dwell on how to stop negative thoughts from controlling your life; rather, he focuses on the best ways to expand and enjoy life more deeply.
Every morning is a blank canvas — and you can splash colors of yellows and reds, or blacks and grays. You can paint bright purple flowers and blue skies, or dark clouds and heavy shadows. It’s your choice! No matter what happens to you, you can choose how to respond. You can allow negative thoughts to control your life, or you can run to home base and fill up with the freedom, love, peace, joy of Jesus.
The choice is yours.
I welcome your thoughts below! What negative thoughts plague you, and how do you control them? Or maybe they’re controlling your life…
If you’re filled with negativity, read How to Stay Positive When Your Life Sucks.
Your thoughts are welcome below! I don't give advice, but you can get free relationship help from marriage coach Mort Fertel.
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