This collection of words of comfort will lift your spirits and heal your soul. When your heart is broken, you need warmth and companionship – and the feeling that you’re not alone.
“When I lost my husband, I felt as if I did not want to go on,” said Kerry on Starting Over in Your 60s – After Your Husband Dies. “Absolutely nothing seemed to matter, and a year down the line my life still seems a pointless exercise. BUT….there are days when I smile at the memories rather than burst into tears. Although it never gets better, the grief does get more manageable. Finding the right words of comfort helped helped me enormously. I’m also working with another widow whose husband died five years ago, and when we are both overwhelmed by a sudden memory (and one never knows what will trigger them) we know it’s okay to cry when your heart is broken. I learnt so much about people as well – some were devils that I thought angels, and others vice versa. I was preyed upon by some and prayed for by others. It is hard, but coping comes with time, and the only consolation I can offer is that you are not alone.”
What really stood out to me in Kerry’s comment was her words, “finding the right words of comfort.” The thoughts and images that help me heal – that give me hope and healing – may not be words of comfort to you.
So, I encourage you to read through this collection slowly. When you find a quotation or thought that stands out to you, write it down. Keep it close by, and read it out loud when you find yourself overwhelmed by pain or grief.
Words of Comfort When Your Heart is Broken
I gathered these tips and comforting words at the request of a reader…
“We were together for over 15 years,” wrote Michelle on Surviving a Breakup – 10 Tips for When Your Relationship Ends. “I really thought we’d stay married forever. Instead, he told me that he doesn’t feel love for me anymore, and that he wants to be free to explore possibilities with other people. How can I get past this? I can’t stand the idea of rebuilding my life and I wish things were the way they’ve always been. I’d appreciate any words of encouragement or comfort that anyone could offer.”
You are not alone
A reader responded to Michelle by saying she comforts herself when she’s sad, heartbroken, or depressed by watching movies that she loves. She finds healing and warmth in watching her favorite actors and actresses, and rewatching movies that make her cry. It helps her see she’s not alone. That’s not my way – though I do love the movie “About a Boy” with Hugh Grant! There’s a lot of pain in that movie, as well as love, connection, and hope. Just like real life.
Different types of comfort are helpful for different types of people, but we all need to know we’re not alone. For this article, I focused on spiritual and emotion words of comfort and healing. I feel secure when I connect with God, because I believe He looks out for me, loves me, and wants the best for me. Other people might find music more comforting (such as the best songs for broken hearts), or their pets, or painting a picture, or even food.
The pain you feel will fade
You hurt. You’re wounded, and you may feel like you’ll never recover. I don’t know how you feel, but I can imagine the depth of your pain. Sometimes there are no words of comfort that heal a broken heart…there’s just the knowledge that someone out there is praying for you. Believe me when I tell you that your pain will ease and your wounds will heal. It’ll take time and you may walk in the shadows longer than you’d like…but your pain will eventually fade. The shadows will lighten and sunshine will once again fill your spirit and soul.
God never promised that life would be easy, or that life would be free from pain, but He has promised that He will always be there when you need Him. He may not give you the answers you seek, and He may not erase the pain you feel…but He is always there, waiting for you. You’re free to tell Him how much it hurts, unburden your sad heart to Him, and you will surely feel His love filling the aching void that has been left in your life.
You will heal if you go into the pain
I remember the exact moment that I lost my sister. She didn’t die; she told me she never wanted to speak to me again. She didn’t give me a reason why, and she refused to talk to me for more than 10 years. I wrote about it in How to Let Go of Someone You Love – it was the most terrible experience of my whole life. Worse than when my grandma died, because my sister chose to cut me out of her life. Worse than when I found out my husband and I can’t have children, and worse than hearing my dog cry out in pain after being attacked by another dog.
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But I healed. I never thought I’d overcome my feelings of regret, failure, and confusion…but somehow I found healing and peace. I have to admit that it wasn’t words of comfort that healed me, though. It was opening my heart and soul to the healing flow of God’s divine love.
- “Let your tears come. Let them water your soul.” – Eileen Mayhew.
- “God can heal a broken heart, but He has to have all the pieces.” – Unknown.
- “God brings men into deep waters, not to drown them, but to cleanse them.” – John Aughey.
My prayer is that you open your heart to God, and let His love and peace fill your soul. May you find comfort in His word, whether He speaks through Scripture, other people, words of comfort on the internet, or the still, small voice you’ve heard in your head in the past.
You really do have something to look forward to
One of the most difficult parts of losing someone you love is feeling like there’s nothing left for you. No joy, no love, no future. Here are several quotations about healing – and about looking forward, to the future.
“When love is lost, do not bow your head in sadness; instead keep your head up high and gaze into heaven for that is where your broken heart has been sent to heal.” ~ Unknown.
“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” ~ Alexander Graham Bell.
“It has been said that time heals all wounds. The truth is that time does not heal anything. It merely passes. it is what we do during the passing of time that helps or hinders the healing process.” ~ Jay Marshall.
“One tear met another tear floating down the river. Said the first tear, ‘I’m the tear of the woman who lost her lover.’ The second tear said, ‘I’m the tear of the woman who found him.’” ~ Anonymous.
And this one is my favorite:
“You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present.” ~ Jan Glidewell.
A new season is beginning in your life
In How to Stop Crying When It’s Over, I describe how peaceful it is to think of your life as “seasonal.”
That is, there are seasons that include certain people and specific types of love, and there are seasons that don’t involve those people. When it’s over – when a season ends – we have no choice but to accept it.
A Time for Everything
– Ecclesiastes 3:2-8
There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
A time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
A time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
A time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
A time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
A time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
A time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
Right now, you’re searching for words of comfort because your heart is broken. But soon, this season of your life will end. You will be in a new season. You’ll remember the past with love and a twinge of sadness…but if you allow yourself to heal, you will enjoy a new season in your life.
Your aching heart will find the right comfort food
Here’s a little story about a woman who lost her dog – and how her “words of comfort” were found in a picnic with a friend…
“[When my dog died], a good friend came over with some cheap but delicious Mexican food from La Fresita. She brought a Cuban sandwich and a green chili burrito….the Cuban sandwich was stuffed with thinly sliced pork, onions, tomatoes, grated lettuce, and some secret sauce. And the green chili burrito was also stuffed with a more meatier pork and spicy chili verde. I ate ravenously.
We washed it all down with about two-thirds of a bottle of Charles Shaw (or three-buck Chuck) zinfandel. With a full stomach and slight buzz, I felt whole again. My dear sweet Painter boy who always savored every bite would have totally approved of my comfort food fest. Feeding the hungry heart was just what I needed.” ~ Comfort Food for a Broken Heart by Karyn Zoldan.
What or who has comforted you in the past? You may not be able to recreate that exact environment or person, but hold on to the feeling of healing and being comforted. Allow that old type of healing to refresh your soul and revive your spirit.
“There are things that we don’t want to happen but have to accept, things we don’t want to know but have to learn, and people we can’t live without but have to let go.” – unknown.
One last word of comfort when your heart is broken…
Sometimes what seems like the worst thing ever – the most heartbreaking loss you’ve experienced – might actually be the best thing for you, even if you can’t see it. For example, my husband and I can’t have kids. We’re coped with the pain and broken dreams that infertility brings.
I still feel sad and lonely when I see a pregnant woman or when I hold a baby. That pain will never completely go away – though it has faded. There are no words of comfort to heal that broken part of my heart. But, what has always helped me feel better is my belief that I’m not meant to have children. My purpose is to create and write for Blossom, to walk alongside people in pain. My purpose is to write articles to encourage you to look upwards and inwards, and to hold on to what is good, pure, right, and true in your life.
Healing After a Loss
In A Grace Disguised: How the Soul Grows Through Loss, Jerry L. Sittser shares how a tragic car accident claimed three generations of his family: his mother, his wife, and his young daughter.
While most of us will not experience such a catastrophic loss in our lifetime, all of us will be faced with tragedy that makes us search for words of comfort in times of loss and grief. A Grace Disguised plumbs the depths of sorrow, whether due to illness, divorce, or the loss of someone we love. The circumstances are not important; what we do with those circumstances is. In experiencing what feels like the end of our lives and our selves, we can come to the beginning of a new life―one marked by spiritual depth, joy, compassion, and a deeper appreciation of simple blessings.
“The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning.” – Ivy Baker Priest.
May you find the right words of comfort, and may you accept and surrender to whatever is happening in your life. May your soul heal, your spirit flourish, and your heart be one less shade of broken.
Laurie's "She Blossoms" Books
Growing Forward When You Can't Go Back offers hope, encouragement, and strength for women walking through loss. My Blossom Tips are fresh and practical - they stem from my own experiences with a schizophrenic mother, foster homes, a devastating family estrangement, and infertility.
How to Let Go of Someone You Love: Powerful Secrets (and Practical Tips!) for Healing Your Heart is filled with comforting and healthy breakup advice. The Blossom Tips will help you loosen unhealthy attachments to the past, seal your heart with peace, and move forward with joy.
When You Miss Him Like Crazy: 25 Lessons to Move You From Broken to Blossoming After a Breakup will help you refocus your life, re-create yourself, and start living fully again! Your spirit will rise and you'll blossom into who you were created to be.
Turn your face upwards and allow the healing rain to help you Blossom.